i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
Randomize
