idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
it was like eating out sand paper
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
No. Way more drunk than the night I put a snowball in my purse "for later" and woke up to find everything soaking the next day.
But less drunk than the day that Pete took four of your birth control pills thinking they were Advil, right?
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
Randomize
