The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
Why would you fall asleep? This is why i cant drink with my lesbian friends anymore. They take my clothes off and get vodka in my top ramen. Only yoouuu can prevent forest fires.
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
Randomize
