I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Randomize
