As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
Randomize
