Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
Randomize