At least make sure they are 18
Why
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
Randomize
