dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
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