Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
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