This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
Randomize
