dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
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