In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
Randomize
