2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
Randomize