the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
Randomize
