very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
