Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Randomize
