and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
we're so committed to being not committed
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Randomize
