You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
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