My dream in life is to scissor with Ellen. I don't care if I've got a dick. I'll make it work.
Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
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