yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
We have so much sex to catch up on
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
Randomize
