For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Randomize
