I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
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