Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
