Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
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