1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
I was giving a campus tour, when a drunk senior came up behind me and shouted at the group, "If Jesus ain't your homeboy - get the fuck off this campus!" Looks like his religion course is paying off...
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
Randomize
