MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
Sometimes, when I pour the powdered creamer in my coffee I like to pretend it's Colombian grade cocaine.
That's the kind of morning coffee a girl could welcome the day with.
tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
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