remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
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