We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
I hooked up with a Michael Jackson impersonator last night. Too soon?
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
Randomize