i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
Randomize
