it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
I filled two of the glass ornaments in my mom's bathroom last night with vodka. That way no one sees me drinking on Christmas. Alcoholic or genius? All I know it makes bathroom trips frequent and enjoyable.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Randomize
