you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
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