I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
Randomize
