dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
Randomize
