I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
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