WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
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