wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize
