She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
Randomize
