One girl and one boy is just not enough.
she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
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