It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
Randomize
