Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
I woke up only wearing a Breaking Bad "Los Pollos Hermanos" apron he got from Loot Crate next to a 3 empty bottles of Zima,Jolly Ranchers, and a jar of coconut oil. Fernet is one hell of a party starter
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
