You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
Randomize