when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
I am watching the most amazing drunk person ever. Literally such a trooper that you can put anything in front of him he'll drink it. His latest reason for taking another shot was: well whatever. I'm never gonna get married anyway.
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize
