So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
Nooo, I ran into two if my exes, both having their engagement parties at the bar. It was like a fucking Eskimo family reunion, but with more tequila.
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Randomize