there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
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