Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
Randomize
