Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
i totally just wrapped her wedding gift in tin foil. These are the skills 2 bachelor's degrees have given me.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
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