doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
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