Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Randomize
