Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
Randomize
