there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
We just shotgunned beers for America
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
Someone signed my nipple.
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
Randomize