Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
My phone just autocorrected 'vagina' to 'vaginihilation'...when exactly did I need to convey total annihilation by lady parts??
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
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